Customer Service Conflict Resolution: 8 Strategies & 3 Examples

Customer conflict arises frequently, especially in dynamic, fast-paced environments. Working with an angry customer comes with the territory of doing business, but it can lead to increased stress for workers and diminished brand loyalty for customers. There is good news – you can turn conflict around. In fact, sometimes a corrective experience for an upset customer can lead to them becoming one of your more loyal patrons. This is a fragile endeavor, though, so taking the right steps in customer service conflict resolution is of the utmost importance. Below is a brief step-by-step guide to understanding and implementing conflict resolution for customer service agents.

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Customer Service Conflict Resolution Guide

Whether you’re the manager tasked with keeping the peace or one of the many customer service agents who face conflict on a regular basis, following these steps can lead to quicker and longer-lasting customer service conflict resolution.

1. Stay Calm

The most professional way to handle an upset customer is to refrain from getting upset yourself. This can be a challenging task, especially if the customer is highly dysregulated and insults start to become personal.

Remaining calm is the best way to meet your frustrated customer where they are without escalating the situation, but staying calm isn’t always easy to do. Here are some tips for remaining calm in these moments:

• Breathe: It may sound silly but slowing yourself down to take a few deep breaths can make all the difference in how you respond.
• Take some physical space: If the angry customer is in-person and enters your personal space, take a few steps back. You won’t be successful in remaining calm if you feel physically threatened, so give yourself some room.
• Notice your own emotions: Recognize what you’re feeling in the moment. You don’t necessarily need to act on it but naming fear, anxiety, or frustration can help quell the overwhelm of these emotions so they don’t start speaking on your behalf.
• Call in an alternative: If you’re the manager, it’s probably your job to de-escalate customers. But if you’re able to get a colleague to sub for you temporarily while you collect yourself, it could help in the long run. This should be someone who hasn’t been trying to manage this conflict since it began; that way, s/he might be just far enough away from the matter that they don’t get overwhelmed by it. So take a few minutes and come back with some fresh ideas.

2. Validate Your Customer

Whether or not you agree with an agitated customer isn’t really important. To de-escalate someone who’s ineffectively expressing anger, you’ll need to be kind and respectful to them. Tell them you hear what they’re saying, even if it doesn’t really make sense to you. Remember, if they are emotional they are probably not being totally logical at that moment.

It’s easy to sound condescending, especially if you’re trying to rush through this part to get to your side of the story. That could reverse any potential positive outcomes. Instead, take the time to hear your customer’s concerns and let them know you’re listening. Showing them that what they say matters can not only de-escalate someone in a heightened emotional state, it can also be the foundation from which you build a long-lasting customer once the problem is resolved.

3. Don’t Take it Personally

One of the quickest ways to reach customer service conflict resolution is to ensure you’re not taking anything personally. It might be hard not to take things personally whether or not the angry customer is overtly trying to make it personal. Your task — and it’s a tall one — is to stay above it.

One of the reasons it’s important to separate yourself from the customer’s comments is because if you feel you have to defend yourself, any calming, validating cool-headedness that could resolve the conflict goes right out the window. You might start lashing out in return, and that doesn’t lead to an effective ending.

4. Avoid Arguing

One of the most important conflict resolution tips for customer service reps is to avoid opposition. Despite all of your urges to prove a wrong customer wrong, resist. Fact-checking emotions is a surefire way to turn a small rupture into an all-out war. Wait until tensions have loosened and emotions become regulated before you start using evidence against them if you need to at all.

When you take their attacks personally and become defensive, you react impulsively. Likewise, if the customer feels invalidated by your trying to prove them wrong. Be flexible, let go of being right, and work toward a collaborative solution rather than opposing them in order to make a point.

5. Be Gentle

Dialectical Behavior Therapy has a skill called GIVE. It stands for Gentle, Interested, Validate, Easy manner. A skill used to improve interpersonal effectiveness, GIVE is meant to serve as a reminder that it’s not just our words that can make or break an argument. How we deliver those words can greatly change the interaction. Customer service agents have to implement this skill on a much more frequent basis and might use it to mitigate conflict before it even begins. It’s a simple concept made simpler if you consider how you preferred to be spoken to, especially when you’re upset.

By being gentle and using an easy manner, you’re being mindful of your tone of voice, body language, and vocabulary. Instead of hurling curse words at a frustrated customer, posturing toward them to assert your authority, or using a short tone, try being more open, friendly, and kind. Smile, even if you’re not feeling particularly inspired. Using these skills just might lead the customer to put some faith in you.

6. Be Assertive

Validating emotions is important and should be one of the first steps in de-escalating someone who’s upset. However, setting containment is also important. This means not letting the customer walk all over you in their rage and upset. Assert your boundaries as a company representative and as a human being.

Note the difference between assertive and aggressive. Avoid being forceful in your boundary-setting, but be sure you’re maintaining your self-respect. Be kind but firm and use compassion as a means to set an expectation.

7. Take Responsibility

Whether or not an apology is in order, it’s a worthwhile approach to take responsibility for the disruption when you can. Chances are that the company was responsible for some part of the ordeal, even if it was poor communication, false advertisement, or unsatisfactory customer service. Apologize where an apology is due and don’t let your pride stand in the way of making amends. Put yourself in the customer’s shoes and think about what you’d like to hear if you were them. After all, we are all customers of some sort to various brands.

Taking responsibility isn’t only about owning up to where you may have contributed to the problem but also how you’re going to manage the solution. Let your customer put faith in the fact that you will handle it so they don’t feel so alone.

8. Focus on a Solution

Once emotions have been validated and addressed, it’s time to move past it. Working collaboratively with a customer to determine the right solution can be just the positive piece of productivity everyone’s been waiting for. Build upon what you just learned from hearing your customer’s grievances. Offer what you can to bridge the gap between them and the company and to limit future frustrations.

3 Examples of Customer Conflict Situations (& How to Solve Them)

The following examples illustrate how customer service teams can turn challenging interactions into opportunities for building stronger relationships and enhancing customer loyalty.

1: Miscommunication Leads to Service Cancellation Threat

Imagine you are a customer service agent at a large telecommunications company. A long-standing customer, Mark, calls in very upset. He recently upgraded his service package based on a promotional offer he received via mail, promising enhanced features at a competitive price. However, upon reviewing his latest bill, he noticed charges that were not disclosed upfront, significantly higher than he anticipated.

Mark initially contacted the customer service team via phone to resolve this issue, expressing his dismay over what he perceived as deceptive practices. He explained that the new charges were causing financial strain and that the service did not meet his customer expectations in terms of pricing transparency. His frustration is evident as he threatens to cancel all his services and switch to a competitor if the issue is not resolved promptly.

In this situation, the conflict isn’t just about unexpected fees-it’s about trust and transparency, which are crucial elements in customer relationships.

Applying the Conflict Resolution Guide

1. Stay Calm: The customer service representatives should remain composed, acknowledging Mark’s frustration without escalating the situation. By taking deep breaths and maintaining a professional demeanor, the representatives can better manage the conversation.
2. Validate Your Customer: It’s crucial to validate Mark’s feelings by acknowledging the confusion and stress the unexpected charges have caused. This validation can help de-escalate emotions and show that the company cares about his experience.
3. Don’t Take It Personally: The customer service reps should remember that Mark’s frustration is directed at the situation, not at them personally. Maintaining this perspective helps stay focused on finding a solution rather than defending personal egos.
4. Avoid Arguing: Arguing over the specifics of the promotional offer at this point would only increase tension. Instead, focusing on understanding his concerns and clarifying any misunderstandings without immediately contradicting him is beneficial.
5. Be Gentle: Using gentle, interested, and easy manners can help soften the interaction. Showing empathy through body language (if on a video call) and tone of voice can significantly impact the interaction’s positivity.
6. Be Assertive: After understanding Mark’s perspective, it’s important to communicate any company policies related to pricing and promotions. Being assertive about what the company can and cannot do is crucial for setting realistic expectations.
7. Take Responsibility: If it is found that the promotional details were indeed poorly communicated, taking responsibility and apologizing for the oversight is essential. This shows a good faith effort to maintain a healthy relationship.
8. Focus on a Solution: Collaboratively working with Mark to find an acceptable resolution, such as adjusting the charges or offering a different promotion that aligns with his expectations, can help restore his trust. This solution-focused approach encourages a positive outcome and maintains customer satisfaction.

2: Delayed Order Escalates Customer Frustration

You’re a customer service agent at a popular online retail store. During a particularly busy season, a customer named Sarah contacts you and is extremely distressed. She ordered a birthday gift for her son two weeks ago, which was guaranteed to arrive within five days. The delivery date has come and gone, and the tracking information hasn’t been updated in several days.

Sarah initially reached out through email but, feeling unsatisfied with the generic response she received, she now calls the customer service team directly. She explains that this delay is not just an inconvenience but a significant disappointment for her son, who was looking forward to his gift. Sarah is on the verge of canceling her order and vows never to shop with your store again.

In this scenario, the conflict extends beyond a simple delayed order. It touches on customer expectations and trust-elements that are foundational to a lasting customer relationship.

Applying the Conflict Resolution Guide Creatively

1. Be Calm: First and foremost, the customer service representatives need to anchor themselves in calmness, ensuring they can address Sarah’s concerns without adding to the tension. Maintaining composure will help them think clearly and provide thoughtful assistance.
2. Acknowledge and Empathize: Next, acknowledging Sarah’s disappointment and empathizing with her situation can act as an emotional salve. It’s important to communicate an understanding of how crucial the timing of the order was, reflecting genuine concern for her son’s disappointment.
3. Personal Detachment: The customer service reps need to practice personal detachment, remembering that Sarah’s frustrations are directed toward the situation rather than at them individually. This mindset helps maintain professionalism and focus on resolution.
4. Avoid Being Defensive: In responding to Sarah, it’s key to steer clear of defensiveness. Instead of challenging her feelings about the situation, providing clear and honest updates about the order status would be more effective.
5. Employ Compassion and Patience: Employing a tone filled with compassion and patience can make Sarah feel more supported. Demonstrating that the customer service team is on her side and working to rectify the issue can change the course of the conversation.
6. Set Clear Boundaries and Expectations: It’s crucial to set clear boundaries and expectations regarding what can be done to expedite her order or offer alternatives. This assertive communication reassures Sarah that the company is taking proactive steps.
7. Accept Responsibility: If the delay was due to an error or oversight within the company, accepting responsibility and apologizing sincerely would be appropriate. This shows integrity and commitment to making things right.
8. Collaborate on a Path Forward: Finally, collaborating with Sarah to determine a solution that meets her needs, whether it’s expediting the shipping, providing a discount, or offering a future credit, can help mend the relationship and ensure a positive outcome.

3: Incorrect Billing Dispute Turns Heated

You are a customer service agent at a healthcare insurance company. A customer, Tom, contacts you, highly agitated. He has been billed for an expensive medical procedure that should have been covered under his insurance plan. The error in billing has not only caused him financial stress but also considerable anxiety about his insurance coverage’s reliability.

Tom initially tried to resolve this through an online query but felt the responses were too automated and lacked personal attention. His frustration escalated, leading him to call the customer service team directly, demanding immediate rectification and threatening to take legal action if not resolved.

In this scenario, the conflict goes beyond a mere billing error-it strikes at the heart of customer trust and the reliability of service, which are critical components of customer satisfaction.

Creatively Applying the Conflict Resolution Guide

1. Establish Calm and Control: The customer service representatives should begin by establishing a calm and controlled environment, ensuring they are fully present and attentive to Tom’s concerns. This sets the stage for a constructive interaction.
2. Recognize and Validate Concerns: Recognizing Tom’s anxiety and validating his concerns about the billing error can help diffuse some of his initial anger. It’s crucial to show that the team understands the seriousness of his situation and is committed to resolving it.
3. Keep Personal Reactions in Check: The customer service reps need to keep their personal reactions in check, focusing solely on Tom’s needs and maintaining a professional demeanor throughout the conversation.
4. Avoid Confrontation: Instead of confronting Tom’s accusations, it’s more productive to navigate the conversation toward understanding the details of his case and the specific errors involved.
5. Communicate with Empathy: Using a tone of empathy and assurance, the customer service reps should express their determination to correct the billing error and reassure Tom of his coverage terms.
6. Be Assertive: Clearly and assertively communicating the steps that will be taken to investigate and resolve the billing discrepancy is vital. This includes checking records, coordinating with billing departments, and providing timely updates.
7. Be Responsible and Apologize: If the investigation reveals that the billing error was the company’s fault, initiating responsibility and offering a sincere apology can greatly aid in rebuilding trust.
8. Develop a Resolution Strategy Together: Working with Tom to develop a resolution strategy that addresses his immediate concerns and prevents future issues is key. This might include correcting the bill, reviewing his policy for potential oversights, and enhancing the monitoring of future claims.

Improving Your Customer Service Team’s Abilities to Solve Conflict

Investing in training programs designed to enhance conflict resolution skills can drastically improve how your customer service team handles disputes and challenges that arise during interactions with customers. Training helps equip team members with the tools they need to effectively resolve conflicts, ensuring they can maintain composure and provide solutions that satisfy both the customer and the company.

Key Benefits of Conflict Resolution Training

1. Enhanced Conflict Resolution Skills: By participating in de-escalation training workshops, customer service representatives learn practical techniques for calming heated situations, which is crucial when managing conflict. These skills enable them to navigate through the decision-making process with greater ease and confidence.
2. Structured Conflict Resolution Strategies: Training provides a systematic approach to conflict resolution, incorporating proven conflict resolution strategies such as the Ultimate 8-Step Guide to Customer De-escalation. These structured strategies are vital for ensuring consistent and effective handling of every customer’s problem.
3. Improved Conflict Management: Regular conflict management training sessions help teams understand the dynamics of interpersonal conflicts and the best practices for resolving conflicts. This not only aids in resolving the issue at hand but also in preventing future disputes.
4. Effective Management of Complex Scenarios: Training in conflict resolution prepares team members to handle a variety of complex customer scenarios. It involves learning to identify the underlying issues that lead to conflict and applying five conflict resolution strategies to address these effectively.
5. Strengthened Customer Relationships: When customer service representatives are adept at managing conflict, they are better positioned to turn challenging interactions into opportunities for building trust and loyalty. Training emphasizes understanding and addressing the customer’s problem in such a way that respects the dignity of all parties involved, fostering stronger relationships.
6. Enhanced Decision-Making Abilities: A significant component of conflict resolution training is enhancing the decision-making process within teams. When representatives have clear guidelines and strategies acquired from conflict management training workshops, they can make decisions that are both swift and favorable for the customer and the business.

Enhancing Customer Relations through Expert Conflict Resolution

Pollack Peacebuilding works with individuals, groups, and partners to collaborate on solutions to common customer service conflict resolution needs. Let Pollack Peacebuilding support your brand-customer journey toward a place of mutual understanding and longevity.