Home > Blog > How to Resolve Conflict Between Two Employees: A Manager’s Step-by-Step Guide
When two coworkers clash, the tension can affect their work, their teammates, and their manager. Even strong teams experience this kind of friction.
Conflict is a natural part of working with other people, and it rarely means anyone is a “bad” employee. More often, it reflects unmet needs and communication that breaks down under stress.
This guide covers how to resolve conflict between two employees with a fair, step-by-step approach. You’ll learn to act early, listen to both people, look beneath each person’s position, and recognize when to escalate.
How Do You Resolve Conflict Between Two Employees?
Knowing how to resolve conflict between two employees starts with stepping in early and checking whether the issue is an HR or legal matter. From there, meet with each person privately, then facilitate a joint conversation that uncovers each person’s needs and interests. Agree on next steps together, document the process, and follow up.
Your role is to facilitate the conversation rather than rule on it, as the guide on how leaders manage employee conflict explains. If you’re working out how to resolve conflict between two employees at work, these eight steps give you the full process.
- Address your conflict early.
- Assess whether it’s an HR or legal matter.
- Give your employees time to cool down.
- Meet with each employee privately.
- Listen fairly and stay impartial.
- Bring both employees together to explore interests.
- Agree on next steps and take breaks when needed.
- Document your process and follow up.
The sections below explain each step, starting with what tends to drive the conflict.
Why Conflict Between Two Employees Happens
Much conflict between coworkers can stem from ordinary differences. Personality clashes, different work styles and expectations, unclear roles, and stress that disrupts collaboration can all put two people at odds. The guide to personality clashes among employees goes deeper on temperament.
The visible trigger often sits on top of something deeper. A heated argument over a deadline may really be about chronic stress, poor communication, or simmering resentment from past slights, real or imagined. Looking beneath the surface helps you see the needs and emotions driving each person’s reaction.
Many of those needs are psychological. Dr. Jeremy Pollack’s SAPIEN model describes six core psychological needs, including safety, belonging, and a positive self-concept. When a disagreement seems to threaten one of those needs, being “right” can become tied to how someone sees themselves.
The UK’s Chartered Institute of Personnel and Development (CIPD) found in its Good Work Index 2026 that 25% of UK employees experienced workplace conflict. Among UK employees who experienced conflict, CIPD reported that 32% felt it was fully resolved, 34% partly, and 33% not at all. Left unaddressed, that tension can spread to the wider team, one of the hidden costs of workplace conflict.
8 Steps to Resolve Conflict Between Two Employees
The steps below give you a flexible sequence rather than a script. Adapt the order and pace to the people involved, since some conflicts settle after a conversation or two.
Step 1: Address Your Conflict Early
Step in as soon as you notice friction. Tension between coworkers can linger, and it may become more personal over time. Set early expectations for respectful behavior and communication.
For a light-touch start, encourage the two employees to work out a solution together. Offer some coaching on how to approach the conversation, then watch closely in case things escalate.
Step 2: Assess Whether It’s an HR or Legal Matter
Screen the situation before you mediate. If the conflict involves possible harassment or discrimination, escalate it to HR promptly.
The U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission’s EEOC guidance on harassment defines harassment as “unwelcome conduct that is based on race, color, religion, sex” or another protected characteristic. The EEOC also says employers can be liable for coworker harassment they “knew, or should have known about” and failed to promptly correct.
The EEOC notes that petty slights and isolated incidents generally aren’t illegal unless extremely serious. Even so, escalate whenever conduct touches a protected characteristic.
Check for policy violations, too. Review the employee handbook, and let HR lead wherever a policy applies.
Please note: this article isn’t legal advice. Federal law sets a baseline and state laws may add protections, so consult HR or legal counsel whenever you’re unsure.
Step 3: Give Your Employees Time to Cool Down
Strong emotions need time to settle. Right after a flare-up, both employees may be heated and say things that inflame the situation. Give them time to breathe before bringing anyone together.
In the moment, a calm tone and short, neutral statements can help lower the temperature. If there’s an immediate threat of violence or serious harm, follow your organization’s emergency procedures. De-escalation supports safety, but it never replaces safety protocols.
Step 4: Meet With Each Employee Privately
Private conversations come first. Discussing the conflict in front of the team can embarrass people, invite gossip, and make both employees less forthcoming.
Meet with each person separately and ask open questions about what happened and what matters most to them. Listen without interrupting, and don’t buy into gossip or assumptions.
You might ask, “What happened from your point of view?” or “What matters most to you in how this gets worked out?” These one-on-ones surface each person’s emotions and perspectives before you bring them together.
Step 5: Listen Fairly and Stay Impartial
Impartiality is the foundation of a fair process. Give both employees equal time and attention, because feeling genuinely heard may help lower defensiveness. When people no longer need to fight for respect, the real issue is easier to see.
Active listening starts with removing distractions. Close your laptop, mute your devices, and paraphrase what you hear to confirm you’ve understood.
A 2023 study on high-quality listening in the American Psychological Association’s Journal of Personality and Social Psychology linked listening to “positivity resonance and nondefensive self-reflection” in disagreements. The findings don’t measure workplace outcomes, but they support the idea that feeling heard may soften defensiveness.
Keep your own emotions in check, since visible frustration can read as taking sides. If you’re too close to the situation, hand it to another manager and stay vague about why.
Step 6: Bring Both Employees Together to Explore Interests
A joint meeting gives both employees a chance to work through the conflict together. Set simple ground rules: one person speaks at a time, focus on the issue rather than the person, and aim for agreement over fault.
Ask enough questions that both people agree on what the conflict is actually about. Then move beyond positions and reactions to explore the needs and interests underneath.
Harvard Law School’s Program on Negotiation describes the interests beneath stated positions as “the underlying needs, motivations, and concerns driving those demands.” Naming those interests can open options that meet both people’s needs.
You might ask each person, “What would need to be true for this to work for you?”
Step 7: Agree on Next Steps and Take Breaks When Needed
Agreements work best when they’re specific and behavior-based. Work with both employees to define who does what and how they’ll communicate going forward.
Not every conflict settles in one meeting. If the conversation stalls, take a break and schedule another session, since rushing can leave the real issues unaddressed.
Step 8: Document Your Process and Follow Up
A clear record supports consistent follow-through. Note what happened, which interventions you tried, and what both employees agreed to. Then schedule check-ins at set intervals, and invite both employees to share feedback on how the process worked.
Afterward, reflect on what worked and what didn’t. Keeping notes can help you approach the next conflict with more context.
When to Bring In a Professional Mediator
Some conflicts need a neutral third party. Consider outside help when flare-ups return after agreements, you’re too close, or mistrust runs deep. Team-wide spillover and two employees who refuse to engage are signals, too.
A professional mediator has no history with either employee. That neutrality lets them ask questions that get to the heart of the issue and help both people explore options. Some larger organizations choose to keep a mediator on retainer for ongoing support.
In fiscal year 2024, the EEOC’s mediation program held 11,998 mediations and resolved 8,543 discrimination charges, a 71.2% success rate. Those EEOC figures cover formal discrimination charges only, so they don’t predict outcomes for everyday workplace conflict.
Mediation isn’t the right fit for every case. It may not be the right path when someone raising harassment or discrimination wants it formally investigated, so route those concerns through HR first.
How to Help Prevent Future Conflict Between Employees
Prevention starts with building skills before the next flare-up. Conflict management training may help teams build shared language for disagreements, which may make it easier to raise concerns early. Clear roles and expectations may also help ease friction from overlapping responsibilities.
Leaders also play a role by modeling calm, curious responses to disagreement. Regular one-on-ones can surface friction before it grows, and the guide to managing conflict through communication offers more ways to build these habits.
Frequently Asked Questions
HR should get involved in a conflict between two employees right away if harassment, discrimination, threats, or policy violations are involved. HR should also step in when manager-led steps haven’t helped.
A manager should usually act as a mediator rather than make a decision. Employees may be more invested in solutions they help shape, though managers still decide on policy or performance issues.
The 5 conflict resolution strategies are the five Thomas-Kilmann modes: competing, collaborating, compromising, avoiding, and accommodating. The Myers-Briggs Company, publisher of the Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument, notes that no single mode is best for every conflict.
Get Support for Conflict Between Your Employees
Pollack Peacebuilding Systems offers workplace mediation services grounded in transformative, interest-based conflict resolution, along with conflict management training and conflict coaching. Our team can support managers and everyone involved as they work through active conflict and build practical skills.
